Showing posts with label problem. Show all posts
Showing posts with label problem. Show all posts

Tuesday, December 3, 2013

How Actors can Benefit from Therapy - by Robert Curtiss

When working in a business as insecure as acting, it can often be difficult to remain a secure person. It's incredibly important to be of good, sound body and mind, and to maintain mental and physical health. Keep your mind clear, healthy, and balanced. I believe in positive energies. I think going through life with a positive attitude promotes positive work.

We all have times, however, when it’s a struggle to maintain a good attitude and a healthy outlook. There are times when even friends can't help you fix what’s bothering you, and acting class is not the place to work out your troubles. 

If you’re having problems in a relationship, at work, or just having difficulties adjusting to your new life in the city, consider going to therapy. Many people try to work out their problems in their minds, but there is something to be said for talking out loud about your issues and hear them reflected back to you from a mental health professional. 

A therapist can help you identify problematic behavior patterns and help you to figure out why you do what you do, help you to cope and/or make necessary changes in your life to move forward, maintain your balance, and to help you deal with new challenges. This will only enhance your life and your career.

Some people believe that therapy is only for weak or "sick" people. This is untrue. In fact, it shows inner strength to ask for help. As for the cost, many therapists have a sliding scale to accommodate clients with limited resources, and most insurance plans offer some mental health coverage. If you need therapy and can truly benefit from it, find a way to afford it. Some people can't afford to not have therapy! 

Remember: If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you’ve always got. Therapy can help you change that cycle, and can truly enhance and enrich your life.

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Thursday, August 1, 2013

Why You Need to Keep Growing as an Actor - by Robert Curtiss

“I'm too old to start now.” “It's too late for me.” “I'm too old to change.” How many times have you heard someone say these things? Have you ever said them yourself?

It’s sad how often we repeat these beliefs as if they are the unquestioned truth. The more we say something, the more we come to believe it is true. These beliefs limit us. When you say these things—when you really believe these things—it means you've stopped adapting to the world around you. It means you're stuck in the past and not adapting in the here-and-now. It is not a healthy mindset. I am often struck by how many people talk about dealing with their problems, yet they don't actually deal with them at all. They shun the idea of therapy by saying, “I can handle my own problems” or “I'm too old to change,” but they don't truly deal with their problems by talking about them. They don’t try to change their problematic behaviors and instead keep repeating the behaviors that cause the problems!

Older people also use the phrase “In my day” as a way to make the present inferior to the way “it used to be.” However, they use it as a way to excuse their non-participation in the present. Think about it—is today not your day?? Are you too old to learn something?? Of course not!

Sometimes we get complacent, and trying something different feels scary. However, remember that a flower in a small pot can only grow so far. An actor in Wichita, for example, who stays in Wichita, will only go as far as is possible in Wichita. That is fine for some people—being the big fish in the little pond can be satisfying. However, if you want to achieve greater things, you need to grow, to push your limits.

We all must keep growing until we die. It is the nature of all living things. It is never too late to start something that can enhance your life—be it piano lessons, or therapy, or quitting smoking.
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Thursday, May 2, 2013

Like What You Do - by Robert Curtiss


"Things turn out best for the people who make the best of the way things turn out."

Someone sent me that saying in an email; I liked it so much I put it up on the bulletin board by my desk. People who find ways to view their circumstances positively tend to be happier than those who complain about the way things are. We are human, of course, and it is natural to dislike when we have to do things that are unpleasant. We all must work to earn an income, however, and we all have the power to choose how we view whatever we have to do in our lives.

How you live your life is a choice. When you look for a job, make sure the work is something you enjoy. You don't have to love every aspect of a job, but certainly you can find some things to like about practically anything. After all, this is your life, and if you are totally miserable, well, what is the point of that?

Let's look at the job of a waiter as an example. Some of the obvious drawbacks of this kind of job are that you get covered with food, customers can sometimes be rude or otherwise unpleasant, and sometimes those rude customers don't leave a tip. All those things may be true, but there are also things to enjoy from this same job: the flexibility of a waiter's job means you are free to pursue your acting, you can make good money in tips if you are good at the job, and you can meet so many people, which may appeal to those of you who excel at hospitality skills. Waiters who like what they do end up making more tips than those who whine and complain and just do the bare minimum.

Beware of the "I don't care about this job because I'm really an actor" syndrome. I was guilty of this when I was just starting out. I thought my waiter job was so unimportant, and I barely could contain my contempt for it. As I continued to complain about every little thing I had to do, I started to notice that the waiters who came to work smiling at everyone and enthusiastically going about their duties were the people whom everyone - fellow workers and customers alike - enjoyed being around, and they seemed happier in general, and made better tips than I was making while I was waiting for my "real life" to begin. I figured out quickly that this WAS my real life, and I made a point to become one of those happier people I admired.

As Stephen Sondheim so aptly wrote in a lyric from "Sunday in the Park with George", "It's not 'Do as You Like' as it is that you ‘Like What You Do’". Try to like what you do. It really is your choice!
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Wednesday, April 3, 2013

I Hate My Day Job But Need The Money, What Should I Do? -by Robert Curtiss


If you are an actor, chances are you also have a support job to bring in income while you pursue the business of show business (unless you are independently wealthy or have reached that enviable point in your acting career where you can survive solely on your earnings as an actor). Sometimes this means working at a job that you don’t like only because you need the money.

Most of us have, at one time or another, worked at a job that we did not like. Sometimes the boss seems stingy, or the coworkers are mean, or the pay is too low for the amount of work required, or we just don’t like the work itself. Here are some thoughts on dealing with this problem. Ask yourself the following questions:
What is it I don't like about this job? 
Is the thing I hate about this job fixable?
Would it be worth staying at the job if I could fix the problem?

Let's break it down:
What is it that you don't like about your job? Is it a personnel matter, i.e. you have a problem with people you work with, like the boss or a coworker? If so, possible solutions include asking for a private meeting with the person or persons, in which you make an effort to find out what they are thinking, and to make your feelings known. This can clear the air, and get the unspoken issues out in the open, with the hope that all those involved can adjust their behaviors accordingly. Remember to be professional and try to be respectful, because being disrespectful and angry will very likely sabotage any potential progress. Sometimes your coworkers and supervisors have no idea that their words or behaviors have upset you, and simply making them aware of your thoughts and feelings can be enough to bring them around.

Is the thing you hate about the job fixable? If your coworkers or your boss still make you miserable, or you can't seem to find a way around the thing you dislike, then it probably is time to look for employment elsewhere.

If you dislike the work itself, the best thing to do is to figure out what you would prefer to do, and then look for a job where you can do that instead. Sometimes this is simply looking at what jobs you can find, and then choosing the best out of the bunch (we can't always find the perfect job right away). In the meantime, since you need to keep your job until you can find another, try to make the best of it, and to take the path of least resistance. Sometimes it just doesn't pay to argue with people when you already know you can't win. Try just agreeing with them, and letting the conflicts just roll off your back, knowing that you will soon be gone from the unpleasant situation as soon as you can.

Remember ... communicate effectively. Use your friends and family as support systems & to help get the word out when looking for a new job.
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